Rethinking the matter of training, teaching the kids to share their things, after all, they OWN these items, so what RIGHT, have we, to TELL them, to SHARE? Translated…
As I became a mother, the thing I cared about the most, are matters relating to my own young, especially the education. On this part, I’d needed to, give my husband the commends, because he’s in charge of providing for our young, I, in charge of the kids’, manners and education, such a good way of splitting up the tasks! On the topic, there was an incident that blew up in the mother’s group recently, the mom mentioned to the group, that her mother-in-law forced her two-year-old young daughter to SHARE her toys with her aunt’s child, and her daughter wasn’t willing, and yet, her mother-in-law, her eldest sister-in-law forced her to. Reading up to this, most would think, “that’s right, children should be TAUGHT to share!”, but, as a mom, I will call out loud: “Who says we must share! Did you ask my child yet?”
sharing IS, a LEARNED behavior…
Actually, I’d used to believe, that sharing IS a vital lesson of my children’s lives. Because we need to teach our young to be, generous, right! Until one interlude that happened, it’d made me rethink the matter. As I’d just picked up my daughter from school, I took her to get some snacks at the supermarkets, she was having a bite, and I’d, asked her, intentionally, “can mommy get a bite too?”, she’d immediately told me “NO!”, I’d said, “you’re not generous enough, I’m going to tell daddy!”, later I’d told my husband of this matter, and, his words made me introspect, he’d told me, “Why ‘must’ she share? Why is it that if she doesn’t, then she’s called, ‘stingy’?”
Yes, the food WAS hers, what right have I, to ask her to share it with me? And, how can I call her stingy after she’d refused? Thinking on the matter more closely, there were also, moments in our lives, that we felt we didn’t want to share things with others, and so, how can we, FORCE our young, to SHARE? Teaching children to share, is a good thing, but, you can’t go overboard on it! The prerequisite of sharing should be establishing that respect for the owner of the item, even IF the owner of that object is only, two years old.
and here’s, the “after”…
Don’t worry, that by teaching your children this way, it’ll turn them selfish, because, my child still loved sharing her toys, her candies, and asked me to bake cookies for her to bring them to school to share with her class!
And so, teaching your child to SHARE is NOT a bad thing, but the METHODS you used, to TEACHING your young to share, that, is what’s, vital, like this mother found out, using a way to help the child understand why it would be important to share is more important, and besides, if the toy, the treats aren’t yours to begin with, then, what RIGHT have to, to TELL the child to share it?
Life, the Obstacle Course 