Guess that she should be, grateful to him, for allowing her, to do what she wants to do with her own life, as in the traditional Asian societies, the men are, the skies we women, live under! Translated…
I’d known my husband for five years before I married him, and, we’d passed through, over forty years of life together now, into, midlife together.
These past few years, he’d, loved saying to me, “go do what pleases you”.
As I first heard it, I’d, become stumped, then, it’d hit me, like a ton of bricks, and I’d, gone out, on my own, to trek around all day long, then, carried my heart of gladness, headed home, to play the role of a wife, and a, grandmother then.
I loved being alone, uninterrupted, whether it be at home, with my own, cup of tea, or reading by the window, staring out the window, to watch, those clouds roll on by; or, riding the MRT out, transferring to the buses, and headed out on that, trail, wandering, aimlessly.
I’d once, wandered on and away, and, I’d, walked, through the entire treks of, that mountain by accident. As I turned home in the evenings, my husband shook his head in disbelief, at me telling him that I was, so brave, trekking the mountain passes on my own. The very next day, I’d gone by my memories, took him with me, as I passed by a local farm, the elderly woman pointed at me, said, “This young lady came by here yesterday!” and that was when my husband, believed me.
One day, I’d started, on a whim, packed my bags, headed on the trains, gone out east to the coastlines, to visit my older sister and brother-in-law in Hengchun. My older sister was so surprised, and glad to see me, we’d, reconnected, and, leaned on one another like we had during our, former childhood years, and, the beautiful coastline, with the blue seas, etched in my mind.
As the lunar New Year approached, every household is busy, preparing for the meals, my husband still stated, “Go do what you want to!”, and of course, naturally, I’d made sure, that the foods are all, prepared, then, headed off to the floral market to find the flowers, and, arranged a bouquet, to add to that celebratory mode of the Chinese New Year’s, to add to the mood for celebration for the occasions.
I’d enjoyed my life after retirement very much right now, I’d, fulfilled my dreams from before, and, passed my days, leisurely as I’d wished to. “Knowing his wife so well’, I’m so grateful for my husband’s, letting go out and pursue what made me happy.
And so, this, is traditional Chinese, I mean, why the !@$% (maxed out???) would you need your husband’s PERMISSION to go out, and do things that you love, you shouldn’t, and yet, because that, is how you’d lived your life, family and husband first, that’s why, you feel so grateful toward him as you are now, retired, and have more time on your hands, and that’s, just, not right, but, you’re happy about it, so, who am I say, that you’d, lived by, the wrong values, right???
Life, the Obstacle Course 