A believer of, KARMA, of what goes ‘round, comes, ‘round, but sometimes, it doesn’t, WORK that way, but hey, don’t let ME deter you from believing in WHAT you want to believe!!! Translated…
My cold caused me to cough for two whole weeks now, to the point the muscles in my diaphragm can’t ever be shaped back up, every time I’d coughed, I’d needed to, pinch my skin, to prevent the muscles from aching too much to the point that tears started, falling, and the nights, they’re, the, hardest, coughing at night left me an insomniac, after several days, I’d become, so sleep deprived I’d, started melting down, and, despaired for the good night of, sleep.
These past few days, I’d become, so lethargic not wanted to do anything, everything became, meaningless, I saw everything negative about the world now, just wanted to, sit down, and stare into space, wanted some sort of a magical cure, to get rid of this illness that’s, inside of me. Every moment, as a man, there should always be a list of things we should do, or something, we shouldn’t’, avoid doing, all of my high hopes, dreams, everything, all became, naught, since I got a cold, I’d, looked at everything, so passively now, and, couldn’t, manage to, do anything. As the body falls ill, it’s useless, dreaming of, going off somewhere, plus, dragging along the pains of the aches and pains caused by my cold, I can’t even, have enough breaths, to have a complete conversation with a friend.
There was that old case in medicine I’d read up on, as the severely ill patients came before the elderly miraculous healer, after he’d seen them, he’d always inquired, “Do you have any enemies?”, at the moment, all the patients were, shocked, we’re already ill, what more do you want from us? In the end, the elderly miraculous healer would have his patients apologize to their rivals, told them, that this was, the best sort of medicine, to get rid of the physical conditions of their own, illnesses. And, I’d started, thinking of all those whom I’d despised, and, imagined how they might act, feel, and think. All of the pains in the bodies I’m now suffering with, may have been an accumulations of these hatred I’d carried toward them, how much they’d, hated me, I would have an equal amount of physical discomfort imposed onto me.
It’s just, that I could, never———apologize, because, what can I do, if the people I hate, are so, annoying? And I can, only, hope that those people will, somehow, forgive my past, my weakness, my selfishness, my pride, my greed, and my pride, along with, the many imperfections that I may have, that’s, caused us, to become, rivals in this life. Whether we’re willing or not, what’s happened, had, happened, maybe, we no longer, walked side-by-side together, or maybe, we’re, still, trekking down this road called life together, but I truly wished the other person, can live, more freely, to NO longer be, affected by the mistakes I’d, made, to NOT punish themselves, because of my, imperfections.
As I’d, stayed depressed for days on end, there was a problem that came to mind constantly, why do people fall ill? Maybe, it’s, a sort of a reminder, a gift, reminding us to, slow our paces down, to hear what our hearts are, telling us, did we go off the right paths? Did we have, a change of heart? Did we lose sight of, what’s, important in our lives? Or maybe, we’d, tried our selves too much, forgot, to take those, needed, rests? Being sick always forced us to push that pause button down, so we can, have the opportunities to stop, in that moment of weakness, to take, a good look, at ourselves.
And so, this, is based off of karma, I suppose, because you believe, that you’re sick, because you’d done something awful to someone else, and maybe you’d done something that you’d, regretted, that’s why, you are ill, but, sometimes, it’s best, not to find a reason for W-H-Y (‘cuz as that M***ER F***ER told me back in ’08: Why is a question that requires volume to answer????). Sometimes, we’re ill because, it’s time, that we got sick, and, there’s no, punishing ourselves, trying to figure out W-H-Y, we’re, ill like we are, you’re just, giving yourselves, a ton of, unneeded, troubles, don’t you know that???