How a child is smart, on how education should be done, RIGHT, not labeling anyone! Translated…
In this art studio of children with special needs, I’d, met a lot of children, some had apparent external deformities, while others, psychological conditions. They are all, very different from each other, but, the parents shared the same responses, they’d, first, denied the conditions their children were, diagnosed with, worrying how others might, become, overcritical of their young’s conditions, and, the children are, observing what their parents, are doing.
One day, a boy with ADHD came to class, after the child came in, his mother told me, that he not only was, diagnosed with ADHD, he was, also diagnosed as, mildly retarded, that he may be slow with his hands, learning very slowly, that if he got too loud, and affected his classmates, I can, punish him by telling him to stand up at the back of the classroom.
I could understand where his mother was, coming from, first, telling the teacher her son’s conditions, this was, a mother’s, protection toward her own young, that way, the teacher won’t be too harsh on the child. After she finished, she’d, told the boy, to behave himself, to not cause any troubles.
During class, I’d, observed this young boy, found that he’d not, affected the class in any way. He’d loved getting called on to answer the questions, and asks, a lot of, good questions too, and is very interactive with his, fellow classmates. After the free art time started, this boy walked to my desk, spoke, in a barely audible voice, “teacher, I’m stupid, do you hate me?”, I was, shocked at his words, and asked him, why he’d thought he was, stupid? He’d replied, “because my mom says I am, so does the doctor, and that I’m, too talkative, so they said that I misbehaved, a lot…………”
I’d told him, “Teacher doesn’t believe you’re stupid, instead, I think you’re, wonderful, because you are, very kind, helping me pick up the materials, and helped other students who couldn’t get the art supplies on their own; and, you’re not stupid, you’re, just not good at some things, so, you need to, find what you’re good at, and learn as hard as you can.” And slowly, the boy started, smiling, and, returned back to his seats, and started, working on his art.
Later on, I’d, found an opportunity, to tell his mother his good qualities, that being overly active wasn’t a fault, that it was, what made him, unique, we can, slowly, shift our focus on his, good qualities, so he can, build up his, self-confidence. Because the medical diagnoses are, only statistics, but the child’s heart can feel what’s going on around her/him, and if the parents keep on, negating her/him, then, s/he won’t be able to, perform well at all.
Especially for children with disabilities, they KNEW they’re not like everybody else, that they’re, different, but, they have, the same heart as everyone else, so, do see, their good qualities! They will, eventually, find what they’re, good at, and what makes them, happy, this is, what all parents, want their children to, achieve. This, needs both the parents’ as well as the children’s, hard work, and it will become, the most, unique sort of a connection you can, establish, with your own young.
And so, this showed, how the parents, are not as understanding, OR kind to their own children, compared to a complete stranger, perhaps, because, we’re, all too close to the ones we love, that we can, only see their faults, and, not see what they’re, good at.