An understanding of life, as one enters into the midlife years, things that, came to you, now that, you’re, older, call it, wisdom, with the years??? Translated…
The radio played Ricky Hsiao’s song, “Thank heavens, for giving me this much experience/ so I see right through the minds of others/whether it’s black, white/it doesn’t matter/for the sake of my livelihood/I’m willing to smile on, and offer a toast to you………”, this was the song, that won the best Taiwanese album of the 29th Golden Tunes Awards. Ricky Hsiao sang out his mindset as he marched into his midlife years, his voice pierced through the hearts, pointing, straight, AT humanity!
As I listen to his voice that’s, filled with the trials of his own life, I couldn’t help, but feel, a bit, saddened. I’d recalled my best friend from my schooling years, we were, once, so very, close, I’d often gone to her house to do my homework, to eat, her mother, and eldest sister-in-law, they’d all, treated me like I was, a member of their families. Then, I’d, married off far, and because, we were, separated by the spaces and the time, we’d, drifted apart, and stopped contacting each other eventually.
illustration from the papers online…
A few days ago, I was, reminded of her, and, sent her a WeChat message, “How are you?”, her delayed replies came, it didn’t feel like we were, connected like we once, were, instead, it was, merely, an estranged, “Hi!”. I know we can’t have it all back now, we can’t, return back to our younger days, and we won’t find our connections back again either, and, my once-best friend is now, the most familiar stranger to me, and, there were, a lot of my former classmates, old friends, even some of my relatives, with whom, I’m, estranged from. The river of time, was so heartless, in, emptying out everything we ever had, leaving, NOTHING but loss, and scents of, sorrow for us to keep.
Perhaps, as we entered into our midlife years, we would have, gotten used to losing things, used to, not letting things bother us. Sometimes, when I’d, wanted to, find someone I can talk to, I’d, flipped through my contacts on LINE, and on FB, and, came up, empty; for some, I couldn’t call, and didn’t DARE to call. Suddenly, that coldness, it’d, taken over my heart, I see life, passing me by, with ALL of its, coldness, still, affecting me. How many friends do we can, who are, willing, to stay with us until the very end? We’d, distanced ourselves, estranged from one another, lost contact. And perhaps, there’s, NO need to feel so sad, no need, to force things, “We’re now, traveling in separate circles, and not crossing paths again!”, let affinity take control then. Even though, life isn’t, always easy, we’d still needed to, learnt o smile on, and, continue down this journey of life, by ourselves, on our own.
Entering into the mixtures of emotions of the midlife years, it wouldn’t matter now, if our pasts are, colorful, or flying solo, all we need, is to, answer to our hearts, and feel ease over it, no need to force things, no need, to get rouse up over it all. Into our midlife years, a lot of things became, cleared in our minds, but, “We can’t blurt it all out loud!” With friends who’d, come, and gone, cherish the moments you have shared, and just, enjoy one another’s company, saving that friendship, inside the laughter you’d shared. When you leave, there’s, no need, to feel upset, the environments changed, and, the affinities, never, at a standstill. Perhaps, in the coming and going of life, that, is how affinity is supposed to work.
Into our midlife years, being able to, let go, of the losses, it’d, added on to that sense of comfort we find in ourselves. Here’s to you, life!
And so, you’d, learned, that no matter how many friends, how many loved ones you have around you, you still, end up, traveling alone in this life, and that, is how it should be, because, you came into the world, with NOTHING and, you shall, take NOTHING with you, as you, leave…
Life, the Obstacle Course 