The downside to making kids compete with each other starting at a very young age, and this is, currently happening, translated…

After I’d gone to the parents-teacher conference at my daughter’s school, I’d became enthusiastic, asked her, “I’d become friends with So-and-So’s parent today, do you know her?  I think, maybe, you two will be, the best of friends!”  But she’d had that look of difficulty on her face, “Mom, but So-and-So is my competitor!”  What?  Did I, mishear her?  School’s only been in session for just TWO weeks, my daughter hadn’t even, memorized ALL her classmates’ names, how can there be a competitor with her already?

having children compete with one another, like this???  Photo from online…

As my daughter explained, I’d come to understand, that as they became third-graders, in order to make classroom management easier, the teacher split up the classes in teams in the various subjects, and, the rules of living, were calculated by points for these various smaller groups in the classes.  My daughter’s group had often fought hard, for the top rank with the other child’s group, and, there were, always, very small differences in the points they’d made, so, she’d viewed the children in the other group, as her top competitors.

I’d encouraged my daughter, “even if there are competitions between you two, you two can still, be friends, I’m sure of it.  You must, give it a try.”  She’d nodded, but I can’t be sure she’d, understood me or not.  A week later, she’d chimed to me gleefully, that her group finally got first place.  “Congratulations, do you feel, a bit, relaxed now?”, I’d inquired.

She’d smiled that awkward smile, “Actually, I hadn’t be able to rest easy at naptime, I’d worried, that my group members wiggled a lot, and we might get points deducted.”  Being too calculating, not wanting to lose, that is, an illness, and it must be, cured.  I’d, tried, to give her commends on all the interpersonal relationships she’d made, and, loosened up my concerns over her grades and school work.

a scantron answering machine in the making…animation found online…

The winners carried the pressures of never-losing, the losers are, even more depressed.  My first-grade son often complained to me, “I don’t want to go to school anymore, mom!  Our group lost again today, and it was, only by one point!”, my child, the purpose is learning, NOT winning the competitions.  Thankfully, my son is quite easy going, the very next day, he’d, forgotten all his defeats from the day before.

As their mother, I’d, also learned, a very important lesson, what you need to cultivate in your children, is NOT the drive or the wills to win, but to make sure, they know, how to, lose gracefully!

And, this is a too F***ED (maxed out???) up system that these school teachers used these days, to MAKE children feel the need to compete with each other, when all the children need, is to compare with themselves, and this will cause even MORE damage, as the children grow older, because, if the competition state of mind keeps on rolling, then, you’ll have, a BUNCH of MECHANICAL people, who ONLY care about winning the “races”, and NOT how to do things right, and this, is what the current education system is mass-producing: ROBOTS who are only into, competing to W-I-N!  Children have NO business, worrying about who wins or who loses, their childhoods are, short enough as is, so, why don’t you parents AND teachers, just allow them to ENJOY their childhood innocence more, huh???  Oh, ‘cuz you think, you’re, preparing them for LIFE after school, is that right???