How children’s love of learning, gets, SLAUGHTERED by the systems, the thoughts of a mother, translated…
Toward how a four-year-old child that was punished to stand for the rest of the class, I’d felt, ambiguous, I’d understood deep down, that this was, the teacher’s methods of classroom management, but I couldn’t help but wondered, at this age, can the children actually, link being punished to stand up for the rest of the class period with the improper behaviors he’d, done? Or, perhaps, for the teachers, the measure of punishment can, serve the functions of isolating, keeping those troublemaking children rounded up somewhere, so the teachers can, have time to breathe?
As a friend who’d, weathered through these sorts of things told me, being punished to stand up for the rest of the class period serves as a sort of a warning, that if a kid is punished to stand up every day, then, the punishment would, lose its’, “functionality”, so, what would be, the next steps, to increase the severity of punishment? For most children, they’d gotten punished to stand up to the point of, “let’s just, stand still this period, so we can all, sit back down as classes start next period!”, the teacher grew worse, keeping the students who’d made the noises in class stay inside during break, that’s, way too horrid, which child doesn’t like the break between classes, and, which person who’s working, is willing to, put up with, getting their break time taken from them? Besides, we’re, talking, about young children here!
Slowly, the parents will comet to find, that the punishments they have in school only worked two, three times, and then, the children learned to lie, to cheat, to shut off their ears, to ignore the adults, and, it only takes a very short period of time, in the systems, for a child, to lose her/his sense of innocence, for instance, I’d started to find the tri-colored bowls (for the breakfasts, lunches and snacks) had made my young son feared his food, with the teacher’s rule of, needing to finish the foods that’s, already, gone sour. He’d, described to me how he’d, quickly, close the lid to the bowls as his school teacher turned away, and I’d, imagined, how a four-year-old was, able to, do this, with two instructors, and a class full of children, watching him closely, I’d not felt, the least bit angered by my son’s behavior, instead, I’d, felt my heart ached for his sake; because at home, he could use his words to tell us, “I don’t want to eat right now, I don’t like the food yet, I’m too full to eat anything else”, and, getting an education should help him better able to, express himself, instead of, finding ways, to lie to the adults.
illustration from the papers online…
My friend recommended that I read, “Summerhill Schools: Witnessing How Using Love to Educate”, it’d, mentioned how the children became troubled, of not having clarified boundaries when the school doesn’t enforce punishment, it’d concluded, that educating children not using punishments, is harder than using punishments as a part of educating the children! What I can do, is to spend time, to discuss with my son, the purpose of his teachers’ punishments, the measures, I’d, tried to put myself into his teachers’ shoes, and tell him how I’d felt, we could, in empathizing with his teachers, learn to change our own behaviors, to reduce the number of time he gets punished. More importantly, I’d wanted him to know, that getting punished sometimes, hasn’t anything to do with right or wrong, sometimes, it’s, just how the adults, lost control over children, and, the ways my son had, come up with, to deal with his teachers’ punishing him, were all, worth our discussions over it.
And what I need to learn is, what I believed to be okay, my son didn’t do his homework in preschool, that it’s okay if he’d not eat certain foods (how many of us eats everything presented to us?), but as children are being educated in the systems, how tough the moms are, isn’t equivalent to how adapted the children would be, and, the shadows of being punished by the teachers, have more of an effect on my son, than me, and this day, it’d, come too quickly.
It’s just, that he still, has a very long time in the systems, learning to sit still, to read, to not interrupt the teacher when s/he is speaking to the class, it’s, just a matter of time, we don’t need to engage in that tug-of-war with our young just yet, while our primary goal for the children should be: how to keep that sense of wonder, that sense of curiosity intact, to NOT be impacted by the systems, that, should be, what we need to, teach our children to do!
And so, there’s, no way we’ll able to, change the systems, and so, we must, adapt ourselves, to the systems, in order, to survive in it, but, what would be the cost, of MAKING your children follow the rules that were, written for them, if they’re, independent thinkers, creative problem solvers, children who have a varied style of learning, compare to, the rest of their classmates?