This teenager really knows her/himself well, and s/he just wanted her/his parents, relatives, to give her/him a little extra time to figure things out for her/himself, is that, too much to ask??? Translated…
I’m a slacker, found a ton of excuses, and blamed it on my age, said that at my age, I’m supposed to, be self-centered, but you’d not seen what I’d done. And I can’t put up with this most direct sort of disappointment, and so, I’d, loosened up my standards, and, added onto my emotional upheavals, to block out the sharpest kind of hurt, from you.
There’s the barely connectable wi-fi in the room, I’d, drained out twenty-percent of my cell phone batteries. Your footsteps hit hard in the staircases, my drawer was, pulled quietly open, then, closed again. As I’d done up to the third page of reviews, I’d started seeing the numbers circle around, the tip of my pen made those, grayish black tracks. You entered into my room, with a glass of water, with your gaze set on my desk. I’d taken the glass from you, smiled, and thanked you. And yet, after you’d, exited my room, my thoughts started, wandering off again.
We both knew, without pointing it out. You’d used the best way, to get me to turn back around, but, I’d, slacked off, at this time when I should turn around. My grades were any better, and, at this stage, I couldn’t stand up tall in front of the relatives, then, my grades were mentioned, repeatedly, in their conversations.
Back when I was doing well in school, I’d enjoyed the treatments, and now, on my scale, I was, weighed against, the lightest sort of weights. A sectional exam, a semester, I’d, not adjusted myself yet, you didn’t say you gave up on me, but at the same time, my younger sister’s grades were, right where mine used to go.
From before, I’d found my own cram schools to study in, and now, you became, willing to hear those sales calls from the countless agencies. And my younger sister’s time in cram schools, already increased, she’d, hit her back hard against the chair, and, zoomed in towards me, who became, the topic of everybody’s discussions, I saw from the rearview mirror, her pouted up lips, I’d not, turned around to look at her.
It seemed, I’d become, color blind, I couldn’t notice the bright red and green places, instead, I’d, received all those, barely noticeable frowns toward me. I started seeing my own emotions, as well as how others were, perceiving me too.
I’d learned to read, seeing that the books said, that this period should be a time when I get to know myself better, and I’d, felt that connection with it, but still lacked the understanding of the words, I’m slowly, figuring it out. I’m thinking, that I may still need, a little extra time to.
Now, I can no longer put up with the self-effacement of the cares and concerns you’d shown me, I’d just wanted to examine what I’d done during this period of time, what I cared about, what I was, doing wrong.
I’m in my rebellious period now, only to make you feel that you’d hurt me, so you would, apologize, do give me a little more of your time of silence, thank you.
Teenage surely is an awkward period in our lives, we’re all, trying on the various identities, to see which one fitted us best, and, this is a time that’s, especially important, for the parents, to stay by their kids, because your children need your support, they need to know that you would be there for them, to help them pass this awkward period in their lives, but, don’t prod!!!
Life, the Obstacle Course 