There’s beauty in the breaking, translated…
V was from Hualien, the most beautiful place in all of Taiwan, I believe. This girl who’s from this region of beautiful landscapes, is beautiful inside AND out, it’s just, that she’d, fallen hard, into the acting realm, and, as the angels come down to earth, the very first thing was to get rid of their wings. Those too huge, too white, too unusual wings, became such an eyesore here on earth.
She’d come up north right after she graduated out of college, as she started acting, she’d started dating the director of her very first show, and the director was, twelve years older than she is. V’s parents believed their daughter to have become lost, and her friends believed that V had changed, she was, heartbroken, felt, that she really loved the director; she’d never met anybody with that much talent before, who’d talked with her about acting, who’d accompanied her, being in love, both were what she’d searched for. Very shortly after they’d started dating, V found out, that the director had financial problems, and she’d, given ALL of her savings to him as a loan, and as her parents found out, they’d, nearly, passed out from anger. Although a few short months later, he had, returned the amount back, but, it seemed, as though, everybody V knew had, given up on her. Later on, this relationship didn’t go so well, the director never used V as a female lead, and, as he was too deep in debt, he’d gotten a property registered under his name too. V left him, and, even as they still worked in the same field, they’d never, contacted one another again.
I’d asked her, what happened? She’d told me, that she had, a wakeup call, that she couldn’t fall for someone who’s talented, because there would always be another, who’s more talented; and, the bigger the talents, the bigger the egos. Later on, she’d been in a couple more relationships, and, as she’d started, she was very careful, but shortly after she got in, she’d fallen, head over heels again. And, in this battlefield of love, “it’s either you or me”, or maybe, it’s, considered, normal, I’d not made such a big deal of it. Until she’d started telling me about her friendships, it was, a whole other, warzone too.
I’d called her an angel, because the very first day I’d met her, she’d shared her whole life’s story with me. She’d not protected herself against anybody else, perhaps, it’s those wings of hers, making her feel she’s, protected. And, with her fellow actors and actresses, she’d not seen them as competitions either, if we’d performed together, I can clearly feel, that she acts, within the role she’d played, and maintained that balance with her costars. She’s an excellent performer, and yet, she’d never fought, to be under the spotlight, you’d given her compliments, she’d tell you, that it was, her costar who’s better that brought her out. And, she’d, helped us look for gigs secretively, introduced us to people, act as a babysitter for other people’s pets, and would have us come to her place as guests to hang out too, and made the full-course meals by herself. And still, once, twice a year, there would be the losses in romance, in friendship, she’d not known the reasons, and, some of her friends, became, her enemies suddenly, sometimes, they’d even, vanished, out of thin air from her life.
The night I got to know her, I’d listened to her talk, without much comments. I’d asked her curiously, you’d weathered through a ton of storms, how can you tell everything to me, holding nothing back? She’d told me a small story.
“My family owns a tea plantation. When I was younger my dad was allergic to pesticides, and he’d decided not to use them, later, there was, an unknown insect that came, that gnawed up the tea leaves. We’d originally thought that the harvest was a total bust, and once we’d used the leaves that the bugs chewed up to make the teas, and, there was, that extra taste of honey to it. And now, this chewed up leave by the insects became one of the best sellers.”
She’d taken out a bag of teas to show me, I’d looked closely, at the unevenly shaped leaves in the teabags, and, rustled it with my hands. So, there’s, that special kind of taste, after being broken.
So, the tea leaves were a metaphor for this woman’s life, she’d been broken, by the career she’d chosen, and yet, she’d still stood up tall, and this just showed how this woman had the ability to overcome, just like the tea leaves from her father’s plantation, after being chewed up by the insects, it’d gained, a special kind of flavor, her life is exactly like so as well.