My Son, Who Wants to Play with Dolls

A mother’s realizations of how her ways may affect her son’s psychological coming into being, and she’d, changed, translated…

That day, as I pick my son home from school, Bull asked me, “Mommy, why aren’t there Barbie dolls at home, or cookware either?”  I was, stunned by his inquiries, with my own chaotic thoughts, I’d asked him, “You like playing with Barbie doll?”, Bull nodded his head steadily, told me, that on the day when there was a toy day at school, a girl from his class brought her Barbie, he’d wanted to play with it too, but the classmate turned him away, told him, “That, is a girl’s toy”.  After Bull told me this, he’d begged me, “Mommy, can you give me a Barbie with the different dresses to put on her this year for my birthday?”

are you sure, that there’s, something WRONG wtih this picture???  Of course N-O-T!!!  Not my photograph…

Until Bull posted these questions, that, was when I realized, that in the process of socializing and raising him, I was, already, impacted by the rooted too deeply gender stereotypes without realizing it, and, the toys I bought for my son were always robots, cars, but it’d never, crossed my mind, that he liked playing with Barbie dolls too.  These sorts of stereotypes are naturally, scary, because, all of these stereotypes are passed to our next generations, without ourselves being aware.

I’d recalled that on an afternoon awhile ago, I’d picked up my son early from school, and allowed my two boys to play on the slides for a bit.  At which time, a grandmother who was there, to pick up her granddaughter to school, because she couldn’t say no to her granddaughter’s urging, she’d allowed her to come play on the slides too, but, she’d, told her close by, “Girls shouldn’t climb up that high”, “you are no longer like a princess when you climbed that high…”………at first, upon hearing this, I’d, shrugged it off, but, my younger son who was playing close by stated to that little girl, “Girls can’t play on the slides!”, I’d asked him, “Why can’t girls play on the slides?”  My younger son answered, matter-of-factly, “Because girls are weaker, they can’t climb too high, can’t run too fast!”

I was so shocked, I took my younger son to the tree close by, asked him, “Do you know mommy used to run the marathon, and won?  Mommy is a girl, but I can, carry you in one arm, and your older brother in my other arm, don’t you think, that I am, strong too?”  My younger son opened his eyes wide said, “Mommy, you’re, so strong!”, I’d continued, “Other than being males and females in plants and animals, there are, nothing ELSE that is, gender specific, boys can like pink, some girls love blue too, there are boys who can make beautiful dresses, and girls who run very fast that entered into the track competitions in the Olympics and win a gold medal too, okay?”, my younger son nodded, as if he’d, understood me.

there is, NOTHING wrong with this picture here, not my painting…

I think, that these gender stereotypes that are, deeply rooted within all of us, needed our constantly reminding ourselves to change, I truly hope, that the future generations will, see that it is important of how we define ourselves, instead of the qualities which are used, to define us.  So, a while back, on Children’s Day, I bought a Barbie doll, and a set of house toys for my two boys to play with, this is, my blessing to them, giving them the space, to be.

So, it wasn’t until that day at the park, when the children made the comments, did this mother realize, that her behaviors are, affecting the young this much, and, she’d made the adjustments, and now, her sons will probably, have a fuller childhood, playing with whatever toys that they wanted to play, whether if it’s a doll house, Barbies, or those cooking, sewing games too.


About taurusingemini

All I have to say, I've already said it, and, let's just say, that I'm someone who's ENDURED through a TON of losses in my life, and I still made it to the very top of MY game here, TADA!!!
This entry was posted in Beliefs, Experiences of Life, Lessons of Life, Philosophies of Life, Positives of Life, Properties of Life, Ranting About Life, Socialization, the Consequences of Life, The Passages in Life, Values of Life and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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