I Too, Have One?

Kindness and love for her daughter-in-law, the same as the love she’d shown to her own children too, what a good mother-in-law looks like, translated…

About a decade ago, my mother-in-law, as she usually would, started handing out the red envelopes to the grandkids after the New Year’s Eve meals. After she’d given out the red envelopes for the grandkids, she’d pulled out a couple more, turned toward my husband and I, and my two not-yet-wed sisters-in-law, said, “These are, for you, thank you, for your hard work for the entire year!”, I’d accepted the red envelope with both hands, and tears started, circling in my eyes.

at the wedding ceremonies, after the bride offered the teas to her in-laws, they would put a red envelope into the cup, to give her the blessings…not my photo.

For a long time, I kept believing, that my mother-in-law treated me as an outsider, especially with two younger sisters-in-law who are my age accompanying her, I’d become, expendable, it felt. And yet, at that very moment, I truly felt, how my mother-in-law treated my sisters-in-law and me, without any differences, I too, am a member of her family.

And ever since, on each and every New Year’s Eve, I’d received a red envelope from my mother-in-law, with her blessings written out for me printed on the envelope. I’d not just cherished the red envelopes she’d given to me, I’d also, never spent ANY money from the red envelopes she’d given me over the years; and even IF I’d spent until my last dollar in my pockets, I’d still, insisted on keeping the love my mother-in-law for me packed up, inside the red envelopes for all times.

a village in China where the younger generations wished the elders a happy new year, photo from online…

And now, my mother-in-law is closing eighty, I don’t know how much longer I will have her red envelopes. I pray to the heavens, that allow my mother-in-law, to live until she’s a hundred.

So, this, is the kindness of her mother-in-law, and, she’d come to understand, that her mother-in-law didn’t treat her differently compared to her own daughters, that she’d loved her, like she was her own, and, the woman in turn, will be extremely kind to the mother-in-law also, because it’s a reciprocation of kindness that they’re showing to one another.