My Husband Won’t Give Me His Wages to Keep

Learning to allowing your husband to plan out your finances here, translated…

Started back in our college days, my husband had worked our ways, to support ourselves, because we’d not wanted to become one another’s burdens, before the marriage, the money used for dates, we would go Dutch; my husband liked how I’d not taken advantage of him, I’d liked his values of spending what he’d needed to spend, and so, we’d become, a family, but the challenges began after we were wed.

“Give me all your wages!”, the very first day after we married, I’d stated to him. For no other reasons, because there were so many cases, along with being influenced by what’s on the soaps, “men with money will act up”, this line implanted deep into my mind. But, my husband didn’t agree right away, instead, he’d turned me down, with that look of difficulty on his face, basked in the joys of our new marriage, I’d felt, that he’d become, totally different after we were wed. After we’d given one another the silent treatments for an entire day and night, my husband took my hand and took me strolling in the parks, he’d explained, because my in-laws and sister-in-law were in control of the family’s finances, making my father-in-law and his older brother NOT have any monetary rights, he’d hoped, that he could manage his own wages, that way, he’d feel more secure.

Later on, we’d compromised, we’d set aside a set amount and place into a joint account, and all the household expenses would come out of that account, and I’m in control of the account. And, if I’d kept the books correctly, then, I’d earned my bonus, and my husband who’s very good with money had, made our joint account increase quickly.

And by this way, we’d both have our own sets of allowances, and not gotten into one another’s way. As for the money for our parents, we’d believed, that we should give our parents our thoughtfulness, more than money although the amount we set aside for this usually ended up being used for our children’s clothes and toys.

My husband who’s studied the insurances, had examined my insurance policies before we were wed, and after looking at the slips closely, he’d found, that I had multiple sets of same kinds of insurances, and so, he’d reorganized it for me, that way, I’d get my needed insurances, without spending the extra money. Even the money for our children’s education and allowances, he’d planned it out thoroughly.

I’d been married for four years now, and, other than that first time we’d fought over money from before, we’d never, fought over money again, although marriage isn’t like the fairytales, but it’s, very sturdy and stable. I think, that one day, when we’d become grandparents, we would still be holding hands, with that light smile on our faces.

So, this, is how someone adjusted to marriage, because when the two of you began, you had varied values that may collide with each other, and, through interactions, you’d needed to adjust yourselves, your beliefs, and learned to compromise, and you had, successfully, gotten through these adjustments you’d needed to make in your lives together, and your husband is very financially able-minded so you feel comfortable, allowing him to do your financial planning for you.