On the progressive deterioration of elderly diagnosed with dementia, translated…
Fifteen years ago, because my father died so abruptly, my mother started showing signs of dementia, at first, she no longer recognized those she used to know, getting lost, couldn’t find her way home, and became more and more forgetful, and, would get angered by the smaller matters from day to day, and all of it, we could cope with, but, as she’d deteriorated more and more quickly, she’d started, acting in irrational ways.
First, she’d become fussy, kept complaining, “Someone had stolen my money”, every single day, and so, I can only, go and buy her a bag of toy cash, and, whenever she’d started ranting, I’d, handed her a handful. Then, she’d slept through the daytime, and, became nocturnal, and either that she’d screamed aloud, “FIRE!”, or that she was, seeing a burglar, breaking into the house! And, this sort of behavior continued on, and the one looking after her, is under great duress, and needed to stay alert all night long. My wife and I both taught in the elementary schools, our workloads were very heavy, once, I’d, gotten too tired, the next day as I rode my motorcycle to work, while I was waiting for the lights to change, I’d fallen asleep on the island, separating the streets.
Those who are diagnosed with Alzheimer’s remember the past completely, but, not the present, my mother was exactly like that, in order, to prevent her from getting out of the house in the middle of the nights, I can only, camp out by the front doors of the apartment, and, when she wakes up in the middle of the nights, and is ready to head out, I’d, consoled her to head back into bed again.
There was a period of time, she’d told me constantly she’d wanted to go home, she is, at home already, which home does she want to go to? Oh, it’s, her home in China, and, she’d demanded that I go with her, to look for that home that’s already, long gone, and if I don’t, she’d started crying like a child, and, all I could do, was accompany by, as she, “led” me home. I thought, that if she gets tired of walking, I’ll just, flag down a cab, and ride home with her, but, it didn’t end so well, I’d walked with my mother along, she was sweating hard, then, all of a sudden, she’d, sat herself onto the ground, hollering, “HELP ME!”, she’d caused this crowd to gather around us, even the police officers came too.
Thankfully, after I’d, explained her conditions to everybody, the crowd not only didn’t blame me, a lot of the kind people say, “oh, she’d become, demented!”, and, more kind people had, helped my mother get back up on her feet, and flagged us a cab to take us home. The Taiwanese public is, very kind! I’m grateful to this day, because this didn’t just happen only that time, but again, and again, and, I’d gained the reputation of a “fitting son” in the local community too, and, this sort of life marched on by, for five years, then, my mother went from demented, to become paralyzed and bedridden!
At this time, we’d, hired a nurse’s aide to look after her, but, shortly after that, my mother passed away.
I’d retired for many years now, every time I’d recalled this period of my life, I’d felt, very proud, because when my mother needed me the most in taking care of her, I wasn’t, absent.
So, this, is still about the hardships that one faces, in caring for one’s own elderly demented parents, and, some of the demented elderly may not just wander off and get lost and can’t find their ways home, some may have more serious psychological symptoms such as delusions, hallucinations, and even more became violent, and, this man had, accompanied his own mother, to take care of her, to look after her, until she’d died, and that would be, a fitting son!