In need of expert advice here, a Q&A, translated…
Q: the Husband and Wife are Not in Amicable Terms, Should They Work to Get Pregnant?
Six years ago the thirty-nine-year-old Ms. Floral met up with her husband, they’d dated for three years, and, decided it was time. The two of them originally didn’t plan on having children, but after witnessing the only grandchild showed signs of developmental delays, Ms. Floral thought about getting pregnant at her age.
Based off of Ms. Floral’s descriptions, her mother was an unfit, she’d become the absentee parent in her aging processes, and, her father isn’t that much better. And maybe, it’s not having rarely any experiences with the elders, Ms. Floral lacked a lot of the common sense, and naturally, she’d not, gotten along with her mother-in-law. Once, she’d had a spat with her mother-in-law, and, her mother-in-law said something bad about her, she’d gotten so angry she’d hid out in the small suite she’d bought before she was married, didn’t even head home to her husband’s family to spend the New Year’s. She’d given her mother-in-law the silent treatment for three months, and, her husband communicated with her, and, following that, she’d only gone on the weekends and the holidays to visit her mother-in-law every now and then.
For the sake of getting pregnant, Ms. Floral allowed her thoughts to get ahead. It’d cost a lot of money, to raise a child, and, how the month after birth for the recoveries is spent is an issue as well; the mother-in-law cared a lot about the money, and, she’d felt, that her husband is a mama’s boy, and, if she were to have a child, she’ll be left, raising her child on her own, but, she’d made an average wage. And on top of that, she’d wanted a good nanny who can comply with her schedules, to take care of her child, to bath her/him, then, brings her child back to her. As Floral told her husband about all of this, her husband got angry, said that she had NO heart in raising a child, that he’d not want to have a baby with someone like her.
Floral felt the world had, ended. For a long time, her husband who’s a cool kind of man had, lived away from her, never heard her tell of the fears deep down inside of her, felt, that she should be taking care of her own emotions. And, being forceful as she, she’d stopped talking with her husband about the subject, but now, she’d feared, that she’d lost the timing on resolving this problem.
A My Advice
This is, NOT the right time to have a baby for you. Basically, from what you’d told me, your own internal workings, the separation you have with your husband, and how badly you’re getting along with your mother-in-law, you shouldn’t have a child. So, just put getting pregnant off a bit, have a serious conversation with your husband, tell him that the way you’re personality was formed, was due to your own upbringing, hoping, that he can show you, more tolerance.
If you can, I would recommend you move back in with your mother-in-law, and try patching things up. You must have a good marriage, then, you will be able to build up the family, and have the kind of love you want.
This woman, despite how old she is, is WAY too immature, if you ask me (but hey, W-H-O asked you, right???), she’s only having the thought of having a baby, like it was, a temporary fix, without realizing, that raising a child is HARD work, and that there are, a TON of unforeseen difficulties after she’d had a child, and, her IDEALS are just, WAY too unreal too, and, it’s just, not the time, for her, to have a child………
Life, the Obstacle Course 