Translated…
By the side of the road, there was, a five, six-year-old boy, chasing after his mother, calling out, “Mom, don’t go!” that mother carried an expression-less face, kept walking onward quickly, the distance between the two of them became greater, the boy started crying, “Mom, don’t be angry, I will behave!”, seeing me, the child hollered out at me, “Auntie, tell my mom not to go!”, I’d rushed up, and stopped the mother, there was that look of fury in her eyes, she’d gave the boy a stare, although she’d stopped walking own, she had her arms across in front of her body and turned her face to the side, the boy continued pleading, “Mom, don’t be mad!”
In the restaurant, couple sitting next to me were, having a lowered voice argument.
“I know I’d agreed that I won’t have a baby before we were wed, back then, my parents were okay with it too, but now, they’re, regretting it, said that I’m the only son in the family, that there’s not enough heir, they’d wanted to have children to carry on the family name, can’t we even, discuss this?” “Then, why did you marry me? You want a child, have it with someone else! I don’t want any kids!” “I’m merely discussing the possibilities with you, see if we can have a child, a boy, a girl, either would be okay, what do you think?” “I don’t want children!”, the woman answered with her persistence. The man tried persuading her, “Just think about it, look at all our friends, people who have kids are living on finely too!”, the woman stared at the man angrily now, “No room for discussion”. The man was still unrelenting, “if you don’t want to have a child, then, we can, adopt, how about that?”, the woman put down her coffee cup with force, said, “Don’t you have a spare? Why don’t you ask her to give you a child? Yeah, you’d wanted to, take her child and live with us, don’t you? Dream on!” then, she’d, left in anger. The man sat lopsided against the chair, mumbled to himself, “I don’t have another lover………”
In the family relationships, toward the children who are relying on the adults’ love, the parents would often, take the love they give to their young when they felt upset, ignored, neglected, or other threatening ways to make one’s own children behave, so they’d live up to our expectations. In relating to each other as husband and wife, the individuals normally stopped talking, and start making something out of nothing, lying, sarcasms and mockeries, or negating the other person, to threaten the other person into complying with oneself.
All of these are forms of “covert violence”, a sort of psychological abuse, and, the abuser usually isn’t even aware, and the abused would, put up with it, and taken it in silence. For a long time, the couple became estranged, the parents couldn’t no longer relate to their young, and the amount of psychological damages, immeasurable. If we can, notice these behaviors in ourselves and change, I believe, that we can all have, a good marriage, a well-built-up family, within our own grasps.
But, just like the article suggested, you’re using these violent measures, without even being aware that that, was what you’re doing, so, if you don’t even realize that that, is what you’re doing, then, how can you change???
Life, the Obstacle Course 