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When you no longer wanted to be you anymore…
I’m lost
and the pieces I leave
pile up,
fan out,
confuse and rearrange.
Still,
I’m broken
and I wish I could be
someone else,
someone like Maria,
like the girl
who talks to angels,
Diana or Maggie Mae,
instead of me,
this half person
who keeps
fading,
fading,
fading
until nothing is left
but smoke and ash,
dust in heaps
masquerading as loss.
I keep reaching
for straws
hoping one
will reach back,
hold me for awhile
while I dream
of days
where running was okay
and sleep was frequent.
I’m blind
and falling
and you can’t seem
to catch me
so I’ll let someone else
just so I can feel like
someone else
for a second.
~Patience
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