What My Students Taught Me

The grades don’t make the “man”, from the professor’s angle, what she’d learned from her students, translated…

I taught in the university setting, which gave me the opportunities to be involved with the children who’d been raised by their parents for eighteen years.  They’d taught me a lot, given me a ton of awakenings as well.  In those students, there are those who took the initiatives in learning on their own, knew what their goals were, and, when they have troubles, they’d found ways, to resolve the difficulties themselves too; and, all of these, impressive college students all came from the regular community high schools.

Last semester, a third-year physics major wrote me, hoped that I can allow him to select one of my graduate courses as one of his electives; id’ asked him to come to the first class session, to hear the requirements, along with the overall course introductions, I’d thought that he’d backed out, but, he’d, stayed, and, had been more than attentive in every single one of my lectures, and, had a great time in viewing all the materials I’d suggested to the class, he’d gotten a lot, and added the perspectives of an engineer major for my course too.  He’d told me, that the biggest wish he has of in college, is other than to master the lessons he is being taught in his own major, also, to take other courses in other departments, so he can get a taste of everything.

not my diagram…

I’d asked him, “Did your parents encourage you to do this?”, he’d told me, “No, they don’t know, but they trusted me.”  In actuality, he’d not let his own studies slide.  Turns out, the prerequisite of letting go, is to trust, trust that your young have the abilities, to schedule her/his own life, to set up the procedures of learning for her/himself.

There was also an outstanding doctoral student of mine who’d gone with me to my book club meetings, after I’d had an in-depth conversation with him, I’d learned, that back in middle school, he’d not done well at all in the mathematics, causing him to lack the self-confidence, that he’d not gotten into the high school of his choice, and his parents, being middle school instructors, made high demands of his school work.   But gladly, he knew what he was good at, after he got into university, without the pressures from the exam performances, he’d gotten, all the way to the doctoral program in liberal arts and social sciences, his area of expertise, and even received the outstanding students’ scholarships, is on his way to further his education in Europe.  It’s hard to believe, that this upbeat, outgoing, optimistic big boy, was once, a youth living in sorrows, I’d asked, “Now, your parents must be proud of you then?”, he’d replied, “Yeah, but mom’s coworkers would still remind her, that the doctoral programs are easy to get into, that there are, a ton of doctorates who received their degrees each and every year currently, that it would be difficult, to find a job after graduation.”

a lot of “learning” going on here…

All of these experiences taught me, as parents, we must have stronger hearts, because there would be those around you, who will exacerbate the amount of worries you already have toward your offspring, no matter how outstanding your young may already be; and, that parents must be very clear in mind, need to have a far off vision on things, so they can understand, that just because the child didn’t do well enough on her/his exams, doesn’t mean, that they’d lost ALL the opportunities in their lives.

Awhile ago, as the scores of the various exams were posted out, the news media reported on those who’d scored the highest, as if, those who’d done awfully will, vanish, into the masses.  Actually, this road of life is quite long, the world is enormous, the children will eventually, find their own separate ways, and start to shine through, and, being beaten when one is young, can become the driving force toward the children’s success as they grow older.

So, this shows, how you, stupid parents should NOT focus too much on the grades your kids made, and just because your kid is a straight-A student from K through college, that still does NOT mean that s/he will fare extremely well in life, like the examples above showed, and grades don’t really show anything, because the grades we “earned”, are mostly based off of our testing scores, and, in the college years, what, did we learn, exactly???  Oh yeah, bubble in your answers COMPLETELY, and, when you erase, make sure you erase completely, and, your choices are: A, B, C, D, and E………