So, she’s a teenager, rebellion’s bound to happen, and you KNOW it, translated…
Growing up in the Prohibition Period of Taiwanese history, I’m having a difficult time, with my teenage daughter who is constantly throwing me those curve balls on a daily basis, and, I can only, hit the books, to see what advice I can find from the experts in parenting; but, it’s just like the talks of wars, being on paper, there are difficulties in every household, Confucius taught his students using varied methods, so, there’s more than one way to educate.
I’d never, EVER, in a million years, believed, that my little angel would turn into the devil one day, that little koala bear who would always stick to me like glue, after she’s older, she’d started talking back to me, there must be a hidden switch, when the time is right, the switch would be flipped, and she’d, turned into an entirely different person.
From before when she’d come home, before she’d even put down her backpack, she couldn’t wait to share with me, the goings on of her day, but now, as I’d moved closer to her, she’d, hurried, and slammed her bedroom door shut, said that she enjoyed her own solitude, wanted me to give her some space, to not always “hover over” her, and, before I’m to enter into her bedroom, I had best, knock first. I’m now, casted away on the outside, I’d not want to embarrass myself by prodding, I’d felt that strong sense of loss, but, there was, nothing I can do.
At which time, if I’d gone into her room, started ranting to her on how I’d wiped her ass when she was a kid, she’d just put an equal size between me and those older men who had nothing to talk about but how strong, brave, or whatever they once were, and there wouldn’t be a point for me, to talk to her door, who knows, she may have her ears plugged, and listening to music, even if I managed to talk until I’m out of breath, I’m still engaged in this one-way conversation alone.
The hormones are going all over the places in puberty, her moods must be chaotic also, she’d wanted to hit me with a STRIKE, but, her throws are unstable, and, she’d thrown a ton of balls. I’d told her often, that you reap what you sow, if she wanted the sweet tastes of the fruits, then, she must work hard, to make her own life meaningful. She isn’t studious, I’d allowed her to cycle around the island with her instructors, to have her experience doing her own laundry by hand, to build up her stamina from the cycling, and she also must watch out for the younger companions who are traveling alongside her.
As the children grow older, they have their own thoughts, and no matter how pressed I got, I can only stand by. When she doesn’t need my company, then, I’ll do something else, hang her out to dry; at supper time, I’d not called out to her, but, I’d made her favorite foods, no matter how stubborn someone is, s/he must eat, right? Naturally, she’d come out, couldn’t defeat the temptations of the savory dishes.
During the past year, I’d dealt with how my child was rebellious, didn’t want to go to school, I’d once gotten affected by her bad mood, started screaming at her, even wanted to hit her, but, all of my ways of handling it, only tensed up our relationship. After all, she’s only a child, understand her, love her, and, no matter how she thinks she’s capable, she still needs her mom, so long as I’m emotionally stable, I can handle this little monkey who’s going wild!
So, this, is a lesson that the parent learned, in dealing with her teenage daughter, and the thing is, as parents, we often forgot how AWFUL we were as teens, and so, when the kids started rebelling against our “rulings”, we’d get loud with them, and, lose our heads, and that will only cause the parent-child relationship to get worse, like this mother had learned, that she just needed to leave her daughter alone for a while, and, when the child needs her, just be there for her.
Life, the Obstacle Course 