The Fire that Torched Up Our Childhoods…

There was, that fire, that torched up our childhoods, you know, the one that, killed everything in sight? The fire that torched up our childhoods, we’d been, tryin’, to recover from, for ages and ages, and ages, and we’re, still NOT quite finished, with the tallying up the dead, and treating the injured victims yet.

The fire that torched up our childhoods, do you remember it? How can you have, already forgotten, huh? Remember how you’d, screamed out that loud YELP, how you’d, cried out in pain?

查看來源圖片black and white days of our childhood became…not my photograph…

The fire that torched up our childhoods, it’s, still, burning right now, and, it’ll, NEVER get put out, not completely, as we’d grown, out of our separate childhood traumas, but never, worked through the issues yet.

The fire that torched up our childhoods, it was, so painful, we’d watched, everything we’d, ever known for certain, go up in flames, then, we’d, learned, NOT to get too attached, because as we become attached, things will get, ripped from our grasps………

with the dreams, abandoned, by force!  Not my photo still…

How many of us actually, survived, through that fire that, torched up our childhoods, how many of us, actually walked away, from such serious burning, untouched, unscathed by what happened to us as young children, huh???

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Posted in Beliefs, Experiences of Life, Lessons of Life, Properties of Life, Ranting About Life, the Consequences of Life, the Process of Life, The Trials of Life, Traumas of the Younger Years | Tagged | Leave a comment

Looking After My Demented Father-in-Law

With a demented elderly at home, it’s never easy, but, we all still, learn to cope with the various situations that surface from day to day, translated…

Since my mother-in-law passed, my father-in-law had been, living alone in their home, for twelve years on end.

My mother-in-law understood that my father-in-law didn’t like living with us, so, in her final days, battling cancer, she’d managed to teach him how to live on his own, like how to cook his own three meals, how to do the laundry, etc., etc., etc.; as for us we’re, more than grateful toward her.

查看來源圖片like this, to remind the elderly the things that he used to be familiar with?  Not my photograph…

Every Sunday, my husband and I would make our scheduled trip home to accompany my father-in-law, to have teas with him, and help clean up his living environment, after lunch, we’d, waited until my father-in-law woke from his nap, then, I’d, gone home with my husband.

At the start of May, my father-in-law slipped in the shower, and was hospitalized for fifteen days, he could no longer look after himself now, and needed someone close by at all times, and, after he was discharged, at our insistence, he’d, moved in with us.

During which time, my father-in-law started showing signs of difficulties walking, tremors in his hands, and drooling, we’d taken him to the hospitals, where the doctors gave us the diagnosis of Parkinson’s. My father-in-law’s health worsened, his mind deteriorated quite fast, and, we were, hit, very hard.

My father-in-law would get up and wander off in the middle of the nights, he doesn’t rest during the daytime, to the point that he hadn’t, slept, in three days, and told us he wanted to go out, plus, with caretaking getting harder and harder, and harder by the days, we were all, very strained.

There would be, different crises at home every single day, for instance, my father-in-law would be reminded of my mother-in-law so suddenly, and asked us where she’d gone to? In order to calm him down, we’d told her, that the kids took her on a trip, and won’t be back for a few days. And, even as he’d ranted on how he wanted to go back home, we’d pretended to call up the cab depot, and pretended we can’t get a cab, that we shall take him home once a cab becomes available. Whatever I can do, to soothe my father-in-law, I’d told those, little white lies, every single day now.

查看來源圖片in need of his family’s love and support, now, more so than ever…photo from online…

My father-in-law forgets more and more by the day, recently, I’d noted, how he’d no longer called me by my name, and, I’d asked him if he knew who I was? He’d replied, “I don’t know!”, turns out, he’d, forgotten me, who’d become, his primary caretaker too.

Money, is the only thing that my father-in-law still remembered. Perhaps, the elders needed to have money on them, in order, to feel secure. I’d heard relatives with similar experiences told me, that they’d worried that the real money might be lost, and so, they’d, switched the money with the fake bills. Seeing how my father-in-law had, taken the money from his pocket before bath, then, putting his money back inside his pockets after we’d, bathed him, we’d found some sense of humor.

With an elderly with dementia at home, the caretakers needed to have a ton of patience, and love too, and the trials the primary caretakers weather through, nobody else can know it. We do what we can, in taking care of my demented father-in-law, day, after day, after day.

So, this, is how difficult it will get, with taking care of demented elderly, and, things won’t get easier one bit, because dementia will only worsen as time passes. But, with love, and patience, you would be able to, cope better.

Posted in Dementia & Other Issues of the Elderly Years, Elderly Caretaking, Experiences of Life, Family Dynamics, Family Relations, Lessons of Life, Properties of Life, the Consequences of Life, The Trials of Life, Values of Life | Leave a comment

The More Tender His Kisses…

The more tender his kisses, the harder the blows will be, that, is the rule, that’s already been, ETCHED in S-T-O-N-E!

You know that he’s not good to you, and yet, you can’t help it, but feel drawn to him for some, unknown reasons. The more tender his kisses, the way he’d, licked your baby smooth, silky skin, it’d, made you feel flushed, doesn’t it? That very first time, you had, NO clue of what’s to come next…

查看來源圖片like this???  Photo from online…

The more tender his kisses, the harder his blow will be, that, is the rule of thumb, with every single man you’d ever, been with, and yet, you still, can’t help, but feel, attracted, to the LOSER bunch? How many times, will it, take you, to finally, realize, that you weren’t, “made” for love, huh? That, you’re, destined, to be, all alone, on your own, that you can’t, find that special someone, who’ll, love you, like you know you, rightfully, deserved?..

The more tender his kisses, ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, why would it matter now, it’s, all said and done! You’d, looked at that stranger, staring, BACK at you from the mirrors, and, found it quite strange, that she’d, copied, your, every last movement………

kisses & bruises 的圖片結果the before, not my sketch…and, the after, not my photo…kisses & bruises 的圖片結果

The more tender is kisses, why don’t you, just, pull yourself, BACK out, huh? You can call on G-O-D, but, he wouldn’t answer your S.O.S. calls, he’d, abandoned you, long, long, long ago already, remember? Besides, haven’t you learned, that MEN can’t be, counted on?

Posted in A Wrong Kind of Love, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Styles, Experiences of Life, Ranting About Life, the Consequences of Life, the Cycle of Abuse, The Trials of Life, Traumas of the Younger Years | Tagged , | Leave a comment

The Air, My Friend

The column by Jimi Liao, from the papers, translated by me…

“Are you afraid of lions?”

“Surely I am, I’m so scared to death by them!”

“Are you afraid of humans?”

illustration of Jimi Liao from UDN.com…

“Surely I am, more so than you scared of the lions!”

But, although there are bad people, there are also, good people in the world too!

That, is why I’m, so afraid!

So, this still just showed, how dangerous this world is, we risk being hurt by those who mistreat us, those who are closest to us, are often the ones who can hurt us the most in the world!

Posted in Beliefs, Experiences of Life, Properties of Life, Ranting About Life, the Consequences of Life, Values of Life | Tagged , | Leave a comment

A Woman Was Asked to Resign as She Took a Day Off to Get Her Prenatal Exams

This is DISCRIMINATION, hello, hello, hello??? And, it’s really hard to imagine, that things like this are still, happening in this, MODERN DAY WORLD that we’re currently living in! From the Front Page Sections, translated…

Based off of estimates, there are over fifty-percent of women at the reproductive age who are currently in the workforce here, but the unfriendliness of the working environment had made women timid of getting pregnant, from the complaints filed to the Labor Department, it’d shown, that there is a 39 percent of the cases of discriminations on women who are pregnant from the entire tally of discriminatory cases.

“There are, just too many cases of pregnant women who get fired on the job”, the manager of the Children’s Social Welfare League, Lee told, that there was a saleswoman from a certain hi-tech company, she’d brought in huge international orders for her company each and every year, three years after she’d started working for the firm, she’d told her company that she was pregnant, and then, the company changed their attitude in treating her completely, asked her to stay on the payroll without any pays, and to stop working, once she’d gone to the doctors because she wasn’t feeling well, the company told her, that they hoped that she could, file her resignations to them.

查看來源圖片like this???  not my photo…

After the female sales agent felt the pressures from work, she’d started bleeding in her pregnancy, and in order to keep her child, the doctor recommended that she should take three days off, and, after she’d taken a leave of absence for three days and returned to work, the company fired her based on a “decline in work productions”.

The secretary of gynecological association, Huang said, a lot of the enterprises are profit oriented, and the workers are filling up the job posts, and as the employees took their maternity leaves, and the company couldn’t find temporary workers to fill up their posts, at this time, the company would wish that the women who are taking maternity leaves to quit, so they can hire someone else to work. Huang said, the system of maternity and paternity leave was well provided by the government, but the government failed to take into account, if the enterprises would be willing to follow the rules of the systems, which in turn, resulted in women not daring to get pregnant.

Huang believed, that in order for the enterprises to accept pregnant women as employees, the government need to provide forms of assistance. Lee suggested that the enterprises should provide a pregnant-friendly environment for the employees, so the companies can get the tax deductions, and that there should be legislations, mandating that companies need to hire a certain number of female workers, like with the handicapped populations too; the government should also give women who are willing to get pregnant with incentives, including having convenient daycare programs close to their workplace, or increase the programs of public daycare programs, and the like.

or this???查看來源圖片not my picture still…

Yeah, this explains why women here don’t want to get pregnant, because of this sort of a discrimination in the workforce, and that’s just sexist, I mean, hello, hello, hello, we women are the ones, carrying our young in our bodies for NINE months, then go through extensive (or so I’d heard!) labor, to pop them out, and we’re the ones, making sure, that there’s a steady population growth in this god DAMN country, and this, is how those workplace mistreats us???

Posted in Beliefs, Experiences of Life, Law & Dis-Order, Legislations, Policies, Government, Etc, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Racism/Discriminations/Stereotypes, Ranting About Life, Social Awareness, the Consequences of Life, The Trials of Life, Wayward Values | Tagged | Leave a comment

Her Silent Protests

This is the only way she has, of protesting, as she’d, lost her ability to speak!!!

Her silent protests, they seemed to be more and more frequent now these days, compared to before, and it’s not like, we weren’t, trying, to make her happy, it’s just, that she can no longer, articulate clearly, what she needs from us anymore.

like this, except it wasn’t done voluntarily…not my drawing…查看來源圖片

Her silent protests, it’s the only way she felt she’s still in control, of her deteriorating mind. So, she’d, exercised, her own rights, to “remain silent, any and everything she says, will be blah-blah-blah!”. Her silent protests, this, is still ongoing, whenever her children visited her at home, she’d turned her face away, to let them know that she’s not happy, and, her loved ones would have to, guess at what was really wrong with her, and, from time to time, they’d, guessed it right, and that, is when you see her eyes light up, but most of the times, they’d, guessed wrong………

Her silent protests, that, is her way of showing them, that she’s, displeased at the current condition of her own life, and yet, the less she’d spoken, the less she’d, remembered how to speak, until one day, she’d, become, completely, SILENCED!

Posted in Dementia & Other Issues of the Elderly Years, Experiences of Life, Loss, Ranting About Life, the Consequences of Life, the Process of Aging, The Trials of Life | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

When Nobody Can Understand What You’re Saying…

When nobody can understand what you’re saying, there’s, nothing you can do, but to, face that wall of silence inside your minds. As you’d lost your viable way of communicating your needs to the outside world, there’s, this huge WALL that stood ERECT, blocking you, from the rest of those who tried to help you now.

When nobody can understand what you’re saying, and there’s, still so many things you have left, to say, what do you do? Can you write it down? Of course not, as your handwritings had become, illegible too!

When nobody can understand what you’re saying, there’s nothing that anybody can do for you, you can’t even, help yourself be understand, as you’d, lost your means, of communicating your needs, your wants, your wishes and/or desires, to the rest of the outside world………

When nobody can understand what you’re saying, it’s just how it goes! There’s no way, you can turn back the hands of time, to reduce the impact of this abnormal aging process that’s become, more and more prevalent in this world that we currently reside in.

Posted in Beliefs, Dementia & Other Issues of the Elderly Years, Experiences of Life, Loss, the Consequences of Life, The Trials of Life | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment